It suddenly occurs to me that many people might be viewing through the WordPress app or some pared down mobile view, and so might not even be seeing this new addition, so allow me to shamelessly draw your attention to it directly. The Virtuanaut Facebook Page has been added to the sidebar of the site, allowing me to share things that are too small to bother making a whole blog post about, such as videos, pics, and external articles. You can check it out on the sidebar or just manually join the page on Facebook to get all the hot updates from me, because you surely need more of me in your life.
Did you think I was joking? Here we go! I’m not even going to try to put these in order of preference either, I can’t choose, instead it’s chronological order.
Also, my premium plan expired today, like I had mentioned before, and this totally messed up my font and color scheme to the point where things suddenly looked really generic, so…surprise new look!
#12 Pantha’s first night home. We went to look at kittens and I saw her sleeping with her tongue hanging out like this like a cute little idiot and I knew she was the one.
#11 I guess she took a liking to me pretty quickly too, because she immediately found her new favorite seat, right on top of me, and has never stopped trying to sit there every chance she gets, even though she’s a bit big for it now. I can’t say no to that stupid cute face though.
#10 Pantha’s first Halloween. Our previous cat would not tolerate costumes at all, but Pantha took this surprisingly well.
#9 Falling asleep in a homemade box bed by the fireplace. You’d think she’d get too hot with all that fur, but she loves stretching out in front of a fire and getting all toasty.
#8 Looking like a scared maniac for no particular reason.
#7 Looking retarded for no particular reason.
#6 Looking majestic for no particular reason.
#5 Caught in the act with the most guilty face I’ve ever seen.
#4 Ignoring a brand new bed so she can use the new racetrack toy as a bed instead, because of course.
#3 Being my gaming co-pilot.
#2 Sitting in the most uncomfortable, spine-shattering position, as they so love to do for some reason.
#1 Stalking some ice cream. I don’t know what it is with her and ice cream and shakes. She doesn’t get this excited for milk, but any ice cream based thing she’ll immediately run up to and stare at like she’s hypnotized, waiting for you to leave it unguarded for just one second. She was mad this time because that was some espresso ice cream so she wasn’t allowed to have even a little taste.
Well, there you have it. Hope you enjoyed this look into the wild world of Pantha. Who knows, maybe I’ll do another dozen someday.
Sometimes you just need to bust out an old DOS action-platformer! This is another fine classic title by the legendary Apogee games and it’s no coincidence that it all looks more than a little bit similar to the original Duke Nukem. This (as well as the also very similar looking Crystal Caves) were both made by the same designer of the Duke Nukem series, though oddly enough, they both came out after Duke Nukem. I guess they didn’t expect Duke Nukem to take off the way it did!
Anyway, it’s all very similar to Duke Nukem in gameplay too. You need to search through the levels to find a bunch of key items and perform a bunch of key actions in order to open the exit. You’ll need destroy the radar dish and find the dynamite to open the exit door before you can leave, but of course it isn’t going to be that simple. You’ll need to find various colored keys to open locked doors and find a computer disk and a computer to use it on to disable deadly laser fields too.
Unlike Duke Nukem, there’s an overworld screen where you can walk around and pick different levels to go to, though the order makes no difference at all. The biggest difference though is the greater emphasis on platforming over shooting. Secret Agent isn’t quite the action hero Duke was, in fact you even have a limited supply of ammo, forcing you to be a little more careful in your combat encounters.
The levels can be pretty complicated and aside from the enemies there are a lot of traps, some instantly deadly. You also only get 3 hits and 1 life, but you have unlimited continues so it’s not so bad.
While Secret Agent may not have gotten the fame and recognition of Duke Nukem, it still serves as an example of the same fine talent that went into Duke Nukem and so many other memorable Apogee games. It’s a fun little game and still holds up quite well for its age.
Playing this again after all these years really gave me an itch for more old DOS games like this. Stuff like Dangerous Dave, Bio Menace, or Clyde’s Adventure. I’ll have to try to fit some of those in sometime soon…
The Shameless Narcissist nominated me for this award, let’s see…uh, I don’t even want to say how long ago that was. Oops. Time sure flies when you’re cranking out game reviews and other assorted ramblings non-stop, but I promised myself I’d do this this year, and so naturally I waited until the very last minute to do it…so, surprise! I did actually notice and remember, it just got a little buried under a long to-do list of things. To be honest, I wasn’t sure if I was going to do this either. I don’t know if anyone’s noticed, but I don’t tend to talk about myself too much on here other than what new toy I’m playing with. For all my babbling, I’m a pretty private and anti-social person, and so something like this seemed as uncomfortable as going outside in the sun. I’m trying to reform my curmudgeonly image though (a little bit), and as welcoming and friendly as this community has been (I’ve only met one person I’ve wanted to punch in the face so far, which is some kind of personal record for me), and when a request like this comes from someone as respectable as The Shameless Narcissist, I could hardly refuse such an offer.
- Display the award logo on your blog.
- List the rules.
- Thank the blogger who nominated you and provide a link to their blog.
- Mention the creator of the award and provide a link as well.
- Tell your readers three things about yourself.
- Answer five questions from the nominator.
- Nominate from 10 to 20 bloggers.
- Notify the bloggers by leaving a comment on their blog.
- Ask your nominees any five questions of your choice, including one weird or funny question.
- Share the link to your best post.
What is the Mystery Blogger Award?
*The award was created by Okoto Enigma*
“Mystery Blogger Award” is an award for amazing bloggers with ingenious posts. Their blog not only captivates; it inspires and motivates. They are one of the best out there, and they deserve every recognition they get. This award is also for bloggers who find fun and inspiration in blogging; and they do it with so much love and passion.
Three Things About Me:
- I’m an elderly college student who is currently trying to complete a major in Computer Science. I’m almost twice as old as everyone else here because I wasted many years of my life being a depressed, drugged up nihilistic asshole and have only relatively recently finally begun to do something worthwhile with my life. I actually originally intended to get into IT, but after having straight A’s for the first 2 years or so, and after having my first programming class, I made a semi-impulsive decision to switch over to Computer Science because I wanted to learn something more unique and challenging. I may have gotten in a little over my head at first, as my perfect grade record was immediately shattered as I found the difficulty curve had increased much more than I expected. For a while I was starting to worry that I’d made a mistake and really screwed myself by changing to this field, but I kept at it until I finally got my head wrapped around it and am finally feeling confident that I can actually succeed in this field. I look forward to serving our future robot overlords well.
- I attribute this drastic, positive change in my life entirely to my wife, who kept on me to get off my ass and do something with myself (but wasn’t too pushy about it) and gave me the confidence, the will, and the motivation to aspire to greater things than busting my ass at ungrateful, shitty restaurant manager jobs. She is also responsible for introducing me to the strange new feeling of happiness, which has allowed me to live and enjoy my life without feeling the need to drown my misery in drugs.
- I have the greatest cat of all time. Her name is Pantha and she is a perfect, spoiled little princess. Don’t get me started on her because I will literally start showing you hundreds of pictures of her. I will restrain myself and only post this one for now:
The Shameless Narcissist’s Questions:
- What’s your favorite kind of scented candle? Not really my thing, but if it was I’d probably use something like Mmm, “old timber, leather, and maybe some blood…”.
- Do you prefer physical copies or eBooks? In the same vein, do you prefer digital copies or physical for video games? Books I definitely prefer the real thing, but I do have a lot of digital stuff too because you just can’t have or have room for every single physical book you ever possibly wanted. I used to feel the same way about games, but the digital versions are slowly winning me over in that area with all the damn sales all the time and with so many games being digital-only these days.
- What’s your favorite nail polish color (yes guys can answer, too!)? Again, not really my thing. I was more into jewelry/accessories in my youth. Spiky, skully rings and chains and spikes everywhere. Good times. I’ve cut down to simply wearing all black most of the time these days. I even finally got my hair cut short recently. What a sellout.
- Philosophical question: Do you think humans are inherently good or are we amoral (lacking morals as in neutral, as opposed to immoral, which is against “common” morals) only exhibiting them because it’s the cost of living in a culture/society and they become so ingrained that we believe them to be inherent? People love to reduce everything to simplistic binary states where there’s only right/wrong, good/evil, us/them and everyone conveniently falls into one box or the other depending on if other people happen to agree with their personal belief system or not, but the world just isn’t that simple. People are all driven by their own inherent survival instincts and that base need we all have for companionship in one form or another, and everyone processes these needs in very different ways and at varying levels of efficiency. Our base animal impulses are like the bios that’s embedded in our hardware, and our personality is the operating system that communicates between our emotions and these base impulses, and naturally, everyone would rather this process be as basic and dumbed down as possible, and this is how we ended up with Macs! I hope this answered the question sufficiently.
- Silver or gold? I like silver because he had that cool mask. The one guy that gets this reference is going to think it’s hilarious. Seriously though, I prefer silver. Silver kills everything don’t you know? Vampires, werewolves, demons, babies, etc. What CAN’T you kill by shoving silver through its heart?
My best post:
Apparently my most viewed post is…Now Playing: Bloodnet (1993)? Weird. That’s a really old one from back when I didn’t think anyone at all was reading this stuff. I guess not too many other people are covering Bloodnet out there!
My Questions for the Nominees:
(Which I’m going to go ahead and give my answers to too, because I can’t help it)
- What is your favorite sugary breakfast cereal and why? (I quit eating them myself, but Lucky Charms was always my favorite back in the day)
- Blue pill or red pill? In other words, would you want to be pulled out of the matrix to live a dirty cave in the middle of a radioactive wasteland having shitty raves, eating nothing but cave moss and bugs for life, and getting murdered by robots or would you rather stay in there and eat the tasty digital steak? (Me, I’d stay in the digital world. Why not? Looking back on it, I’m really not sure what the downside was. Seemed like everyone’s quality of life was way higher in the digital world.)
- Who is your favorite superhero(ine) and why? (I always liked Spider-Man the most because as ridiculous as his life is, he still had the closest to realistic problems. He’s always trying to balance his secret identity with his personal life and usually destroying the latter to preserve the former because he just cared too damn much. That and the jokes and great enemies.)
- What is your favorite video game specifically from your childhood and why? (Contra, easily. It never ever gets old no matter how many times I play it.)
- Would you like to live forever and why or why not? (Me, I say all that “immortality would be boring” is for suckers. I’d live forever and love it, preferably as some kind of Lawnmower Man style digital god, but perhaps I’ve said too much…)
Well, that’s it then. I’ve done it. Naturally, I don’t intend for anyone mentioned here to feel at all obligated to reply to this. If this isn’t your thing, I understand perfectly and hold no ill will if you don’t do one. Now, I gotta get back to my long family Christmas vacation which will likely be so uneventful that I’ll never speak of it again. Happy holidays to all you masochistic readers out there!
Not to be confused with other “Fall” games, like Black: The Fall, or apparently another completely unrelated game also called The Fall, this particular The Fall is more of a point and click adventure…sort of. The Fall is the fascinating story of a mysterious person future soldier who has crash landed on a mysterious planet. Mystery person seems to be injured and unconscious, so their fancy advanced battle suit’s AI takes over and begins its quest to find medical attention for its wounded user. The AI has full motor control over the suit, along with many other functions, though most of these are locked and/or damaged, to be opened again through future actions.
For the most part, this all plays out in the form of what is mostly reminiscent of a point and click adventure, though it controls like a side-scrolling action game and features some very rudimentary combat…
View original post 293 more words
Marvel vs. Capcom Infinite is finally here and if the internet is to be believed, it’s the latest Mass Effect: Andromeda-type controversy, because OMG TWO CHARACTER’S FACES LOOK WEIRD IN CUTSCENES! I admit, there really are precisely two characters who have weird faces in otherwise incredible looking cutscenes. I was so distraught when I gazed upon these two faces of questionable quality that I cried and vomited simultaneously, then called my mom and told her to take this pile of garbage back to the virtual landfill from which it sprang! Sorry, just kidding, game’s awesome.
As I said previously, upon playing the demo, the single player campaign’s fan-fiction-ish mashing together of classic Marvel and Capcom characters repeatedly punches me right in the nostalgias. Yes, the story is incredibly cheesy and childish. It often feels much like something you would have seen in a Saturday…
View original post 826 more words
Symphony of the Night is not just hands-down the greatest Castlevania game of all time, but I also consider it one of the top 5 greatest video games of all time. It is not just the original Metroidvania, but it’s the pinnacle of subgenre. Great looking backgrounds and enemies, incredible level design, a large array of interesting locations and a crazy boss for each of them, an amazing soundtrack, and more items than you’ll ever find no matter how many times you play. Seriously, I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve beaten this and I’ve still never gotten that damn Crissaegrim (the ultimate weapon in the game, only found through random drop), which angers me to no end, because I let a friend play my copy of this back in high school and he literally found it by accident within minutes. Someday…
People complain about the voice acting…
View original post 998 more words
Wowwwww, where did this game come from? I had heard nice things about it, but it didn’t look or sound particularly amazing. It really just looks like Journey, but underwater, and while Journey also surprised me with it’s endearing simplicity, it’s got nothing on the sheer beauty of the world of Abzu.
I grabbed this when it was one of the free PS Plus games a month or two ago, not really expecting much, but hey free is free. I ended up trying it out recently when I had a few hours to kill between longer games, half-expecting that it would just end up deleted and forgotten like the majority of the free monthly games offered. Oh, how wrong I was.
I think it’s something that has to be seen in its full glory to really have the same impact. Not only do screenshots do it justice, but even…
View original post 272 more words
I have a confession to make. I’ve never played Night Trap before! It sure seems like something I’d have played, doesn’t it? I’ve always wanted to try it, but I never had a Sega CD and I just never got around to playing the later ports. On the plus side, this means I went into this completely untainted by any nostalgic bias.
The first thing I noticed about Night Trap was that it was indeed a very dated game. It was originally designed as a VHS game and it definitely shows, for better or worse.
From the characters, the sets, the plot, the dialogue, the tone, the music, and everything else, this game just bleeds 80’s-ness. It all feels very much like some kind of cheesy made-for-TV horror movie that you would have seen in the early 80’s. The kind that’s…
View original post 909 more words